The Best Drinking Game You’ve Never Heard Of

 NOT FOR THE WEAKHEARTED

There’s a number of games that seem to make the rounds whenever the words “drinking game” are muttered. But fear not! You have not played this game. This game is not for the weak spirited or the sensitive. Beware: this game is sure to bring out some strong emotions for participants.

If you are at all curious about what people think of you this is the perfect game for you. If you want to possibly offend people, this is the perfect game for you. If you do not give one care in the world, this is the perfect game for you.

So, without further ado, here is how to play Paranoia:

• Seat every one in a circle and take a long drink before the game begins because things are about to go either uphill if you are well liked, or downhill if you are on the cusp.
  • One suggestion is to down a cup of vodka or whiskey because things are about to get real.
  • Two 4Lokos might get the job done too (the new gold ones are delicious by the way).
• Pick a starting person to begin the game. They must whisper a question into the ear of the person sitting directly to the left of them.
• The person who heard the question must say out loud, the answer.
• To find out the answer, the person who had their name said must drink. If they choose not to, the rest of the circle gets to hear it whispered.

Here is an example. Jeremy is chosen to start. Terra is sitting to the left of Jeremy. Jeremy whispers into Terra’s ear, “Who is the most attractive person here.” Terra then shouts, “Antonio,” who is sitting across from Terra. Antonio, surprised his name was said and curious as to what the question was, downs his drink in record time, and Terra repeats the question that was asked for all to hear. Next, Terra asks the person left to her an original question.

Warning: this may cause extreme hostility for participants who are more honest than others. Play only with people who you feel 100% comfortable with. Even so, you might lose a few friends in the process. But hey, at least you know where you stand!